Children are similar to wet clay and if the fingers handling it move properly, they would turn out to be a perfect piece of art. In other words, apt parenting is essential for a child. So now the question arises-what is the ideal parenting style?
Parenting can be classified in four styles- the overly strict one (authoritarian), the flexible one (authoritative), the one which allows full freedom (permissive) and the one where the parent hardly pays attention (uninvolved). In my opinion, the authoritative parenting style is the most effective.
Nobody, irrespective of age, likes to be restricted. Putting heavy restrictions on children from a very tender age leads to child being hesitant in making decisions later in life because they become unreasonably dependent. They also develop a deep-seated rage against the parents.
However, keeping children void of rules is not advantageous either. Often, children are incapable of handling decisions like screen-time and need guidance to understand management and decisions. If parents showcase few to zero expectations to their children, kids might not be motivated enough to try new things.
The middle ground between being excessively strict and being too allowing is to be authoritative.
Several researches mentioned in famous books have found that this style works the best on all types of children-be it stubborn or sensitive as parents being too strict or blunt with an emotional child can demotivate the child and create an unsolvable rift between them; while slacking in rules with a stubborn child might fuel their attitude.
Listening to the child’s opinion rather than simply forcing the parents’ thoughts leads to the child weaning off their parents’ hold and becoming independent.
Parents expressing expectations and maintaining a reward-system encourages the child to try things that they never even thought of trying before. This also leads to a good academic record. The praises also prove to the ward that they are cherished and protect them from the clutches of depression and other mental disorders which they might be prone to when the parent is uninvolved.
Many might argue that the parent needs to be the ‘boss’ of the house for proper upbringing. Authoritative style of parenting keeps the parent as the ‘boss’ of the house without making the child feel as if their opinions are not good enough to be taken into consideration, and neither does it make the child feel unloved. In this fashion, the parent is not only being the creator of the rules but also has a close, almost friendship-like, bond with the child.
On account of this, both parent and child are content, and the children not only get the guidance they require but also get the love that they crave. Hence, being authoritative is the ‘spot-on’ or ideal type of parenting in my thoughts.
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